I hope you are satisfied you have ruined my brain, I cant stop coming up with ridiculous metaphors and snippets of what I imagine is in the worst most cheesy romance novels.
"Racquella was consumed by an inner flame as soon as she laid eyes on the farm hand Felipe'. His bronzed skin and powerful body made her forget that he was a hired hand and she the heir to the Montegue fortune, neither society nor her overbearing father would never accept the match but the second their eyes locked her mind raced and began concocting ways for him to wrap his powerful arms around her, she imagined him eagerly ripping off her riding pants so he could taste her sweet nectar that much sooner and bring her to peaks of ecstasy as he explored her luscious labyrinth of love....
There your post made me think of that kind of crap now you get to read it.
So glad you found your way here! And I too almost died laughing at that one -- I really ought to have kept a spreadsheet of all the books I read and found these in!
I also do have to say that if romance novels (socially acceptable porn for women) are full of allusions to pain and sex the authors are doing something seriously wrong in bed, or have a subliminal S&M kink.
I hope you are satisfied you have ruined my brain, I cant stop coming up with ridiculous metaphors and snippets of what I imagine is in the worst most cheesy romance novels.
"Racquella was consumed by an inner flame as soon as she laid eyes on the farm hand Felipe'. His bronzed skin and powerful body made her forget that he was a hired hand and she the heir to the Montegue fortune, neither society nor her overbearing father would never accept the match but the second their eyes locked her mind raced and began concocting ways for him to wrap his powerful arms around her, she imagined him eagerly ripping off her riding pants so he could taste her sweet nectar that much sooner and bring her to peaks of ecstasy as he explored her luscious labyrinth of love....
There your post made me think of that kind of crap now you get to read it.
Holy shit "tender petals of womanly delight" has me dying.
I don't know what sort of internet rabbit hole I fell down to end up here but I am glad I did I haven't enjoyed a blog post this much... ever.
And damn "MightyMastOfManhoodLOL" isn't showing up as my profile name. Shit
So glad you found your way here! And I too almost died laughing at that one -- I really ought to have kept a spreadsheet of all the books I read and found these in!
I also do have to say that if romance novels (socially acceptable porn for women) are full of allusions to pain and sex the authors are doing something seriously wrong in bed, or have a subliminal S&M kink.
Oh you missed the updated part of my post where I shared the user name I tried to use but it wouldn't show up.
"MightyMastOfManhoodLOL" is what I tried to use. I thought that was almost as funny as your contributions.
Cackling at my airport terminal while I read this....!
I'm glad they have you a cackle!! 🤣